For Friends
by Ziona
Summary: PG13 for a sensitive subject. Yugi battles depression. Short fanfic... for my friends who helped me through my hard times.


**__**

Like most people in the world even characters of our favorite shows go through emotions and trials. They go through death, divorce, love, hate, depression and things we can't even explain ourselves. I think that's what makes them so interesting and so alive. Perhaps this fanfiction is something that I've wanted to express for years, perhaps it's something that's manifested in my mind and that I haven't let go yet. But I think those who know me will understand what I'm saying and those who really mean the world to me will know exactly what I mean. 

I do not own any of the material in the YuGiOh shows. I simply tie these stories and characters into my own life experiences. 

Things had been spiraling out of control for the last few days. Yugi couldn't quite figure on what was wrong but he knew that something was. He just didn't feel like himself. He felt alone and he felt distant from everyone else around him. Even his closest friends and he'd been trying to hide it all from Yami. He hadn't said a word to Joey in over a day and the others were beginning to notice. Maybe it was a phase, or maybe it was something more serious than that. Yugi couldn't tell. He tried to keep all this to himself but things kept slipping by him that warned others of something.

Yami could tell. Yami always knew what was on Yugi's mind and he could usually help his young Aibou but something about this downward spiral prevented Yami from being able to solve anything. Yugi's spirit companion was getting frantic trying to figure out what was wrong with his Aibou. Something was wrong but he couldn't figure on what it was. Yugi wasn't saying anything and Yami couldn't find out why. It was like Yugi had put up a roadblock and Yami couldn't find a way around it. The only thing that Yami could do was to ask about the problem and be by Yugi's side to help him through whatever he needed help with. 

" What's wrong Aibou?" Yami asked him one evening while he was sitting on the edge of Yugi's bed, watching the young boy. Yugi simply shrugged and kept his eyes down. There was an odd silence between the two and Yami waited patiently for the boy to clear his mind and try to vocalize his thoughts. 

" I don't know," Yugi finally looked up at his Yami, his dark violet eyes bearing no sign of what was troubling him. Yami watched his Aibou for a moment and frowned, his eyes turning slightly darker from worry. Yugi had been so quiet lately. He hadn't spoken a word and he hadn't called on Yami lately either. His friends hadn't been over and from what Yami could tell Yugi hadn't even spoken to Joey lately. 

" Aibou, what's going on?" Yami moved a little closer to the young boy, crouching down to get eye level with him. " Something's bothering you. You haven't been acting yourself lately." 

" I don't know what's bothering me though," Yugi whispered, turning so that Yami caught nothing but his profile. Yami watched him a moment longer, sighing heavily in frustration and worry. If he couldn't find out what was wrong with his young Aibou he might as well leave. Yami disappeared leaving Yugi alone on his bed, his head bent forward. Yugi felt Yami leave and sighed heavily before burying his face in his hands and weeping, his small frame shaking with silent sobs.

Yugi woke the next morning, still in his jeans and jacket. He looked around for a moment and saw the light streaming in through the window. Good thing it was Saturday or else he would have been late for school. Yugi yawned a little and got up, treading over to the window, looking out on the sun tinted world. For some reason it didn't feel very cheery to him. If anything he just wanted to lock himself away in a closet and just sit there the rest of his life. He didn't like this feeling that he was having but he couldn't put a finger on it. Yugi sighed and leaned an elbow on the desk, propping himself up and watching out the window. 

_Things used to be so simple._ Yugi thought to himself._ Now… I'm not so sure anymore. I feel so alone._

But you're not alone. Yugi heard Yami's voice in the back of his head. Yugi stopped a moment but sighed heavily. _What's bothering you Aibou?_

Nothing in particular. Yugi told him. Yami made a disapproving sound in the back of his throat. _I'm serious! I can't put a finger on it either. If I knew I would tell you… honest Yami._

Why do I have a feeling you know more than you're letting on? Yami asked. Yugi just shook his head. 

_I'm telling you all I know._ Yugi tried again. _Trust me Yami… you trusted me before. _Yami sighed heavily. The sound of Yami's comforting voice disappeared from Yugi's head again and Yugi sighed heavily, choking back a few tears. He just felt like curling up in a ball and crying. He couldn't explain it…. It just felt like everything was coming to an end. 

Yugi made his way out of his room and headed into the dimly lit hall. He trudged down the hall, heading towards the bathroom. Once inside he locked the door, leaning on the sink to glance into the mirror. 

Yugi balled his hands into fists and felt a sudden urge to punch through something. He glanced around and headed over to the sliding glass doors of the shower. His anger boiled over and he just let loose, punching through the glass. The glass shattered all over the bathroom floor, cutting up his fists but he didn't care. He began to bleed and Yugi stood a moment, looking at his hands in wonder. They didn't hurt… they didn't hurt at all. Either that or he didn't mind the pain. For some reason seeing his blood flowing from his hands gave him an adrenaline rush. 

" I've never felt this before," Yugi whispered to himself. Something stirred in the back of his mind and he felt Yami awaken from the pain he was probably feeling. Yugi turned back to the mirror, grasping the edge of the sink with his bleeding hands. The blood ran down into the sink, making a small red pool in the bottom of the white bowl. He couldn't help but smile. 

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Yugi…Aibou what are you doing? Yami's voice came through to him and Yugi grabbed for the Millenium Puzzle, yanking it off of his neck and throwing it across the room. It shattered against the wall and for some reason Yugi felt like an entire burden was lifted off his shoulders. Yugi straightened and turned his eyes on the mirror again.

He reached for the cabinet next to the sink, his blood smearing on the front of the cabinet. Inside he found some medicine, a few razors… nothing else of much interest. Yugi collected the few razors that he found and turned them in his hands, opening them carefully. The metal glinted in the dull light and he couldn't help but smirk a little. 

__

If the glass gave me this much of a rush what would a razor do? Yugi couldn't help but ask himself. He thought a moment but hesitated, his mind turning the idea over in his head. Yugi headed over to the bathtub, turning the faucets on. The water was hot but not too hot… or too cold. 

Yugi plunged his hands deep into the water, grasping the razor in one hand. Quickly he slit both his wrists, watching as the red blood entered the water, turning the entire bathtub into crimson pool. He watched in awe at the amount of blood that spurted from his wrists. The water washed over his arms and Yugi leaned over the edge of the tub, looking into the water.

For a moment the water disappeared and in its place he saw memories flashing by. It was like he saw his entire life in front of him. He remembered his friends, the duels, and the battles they'd won together. He remembered how they were always there for him and in a second his mind began to doubt what he was doing.

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Why am I doing this? Yugi asked himself, his eyes staring down and seeing the crimson water once again. 

After a while his head began to reel and he moaned a little, lifting his wrists from the crimson water. The room began to spin and he sat back on his heels. He put a hand to his forehead, the bloody water dripping down his arms.

" Why am I so," Yugi started to speak but a wave of dizziness washed over him and in a moment he was on the floor, staring up at the ceiling, wondering what exactly went wrong. 

A day later he awoke in the hospital, his eyes focusing in on the low ceiling above him. He couldn't remember anything and he certainly couldn't figure out where he was. He tried to sit up but a hand was on his shoulder, holding him back down. 

" Don't try to move… you're still too weak," The voice of Joey Wheeler reached his ears and Yugi couldn't help but smile. 

" What happened?" Yugi asked, putting a hand to his forehead, trying to remember what had occurred. He noticed a thick piece of gauze on his wrist and he turned his questioning violet eyes on Joey. 

" I would like to ask you the same question, Yug," Joey whispered. Yugi watched his friend a moment, unsure of what to say. " You're the one who slit your wrists. What happened Yug? What made you think that you had to die?" 

" What are you talking about?" Yugi asked, narrowing his eyes. " What…" he trailed off, his memory coming back slightly. The crimson pool… everything was coming back. Yugi put both hands to his forehead, shutting his eyes against memories. 

" Yugi… we're always here for you," Joey whispered. " You never have to think that death is what you need. We're your friends and we're here for you no matter what sort of troubles you're finding in your life," Joey put a hand to Yugi's arm, pulling his hand down so that Yugi could see Joey's face. A single tear fell from his brown eyes and he smiled slightly. " You understand that, Yug?" 

" Yea… I understand," Yugi smiled back. The two best friends looked at each other for a moment before embracing quickly. " It's good to be back."

" It's great to see you back, Yug," Joey smiled a little and whipped away the tears that had gathered in his eyes. " Welcome back Yugi."

**__**

For all my friends who, like Joey to Yugi, helped me through my pain, trails and emotions. They stuck next to my side every step of the way and never wavered in their persistence and strength. For that I owe them my life and I will die before I see harm come to any of them. They were there for me and I will always be there for them.

~"Ziona" 


End file.
